Why I’m breaking up with my phone

We need to break up, our relationship is toxic and I want out. I’ve been thinking about it a lot recently and the truth is that I can’t have you affecting my relationships with my children and my partner, they’re more important to me than you. 

I don’t want to cheat on them with you anymore! 

Over the last few years you’ve become like a drug, an addiction. I can’t go a day without using you, I know where you are constantly and think about you often. You make my interaction with the real World less real, everything at the touch of my fingertips I scroll through other peoples lives, ignoring my own. 

When I’m feeling down, I look at you for longer and you take advantage of that, you feed off my anxiety sucking me in to social media that only serves to make me feel worse. 

Somehow so controlling you make me feel like without you I will be missing what’s happening, I will be missing out, that I’m a better person with you and that I need you. The reality is that you are the one making me miss out on my life, the life right in front of me a life that would be perfectly great without you. 

When I take a picture, a video clip of my beautiful children you distract me. Those memories I want to cherish by taking a photo of I’m then missing right before my eyes, because instead of watching and playing with them, I’m looking at you. Distracted by an email or a message, things that can wait that you make seem urgent. 

I don’t want something to happen to me suddenly and my children to have memories of me with you instead of them. Images in their mind of me staring at your screen saying “In a minute” when they are asking me to look, to show them I love them. 

I don’t want to get to five years, ten years in the future and look back at their early days when they are so needy and you provided me with a break, to realise how much that break made me miss. 

I’ve fallen out of love with you. 

I’m not sorry. I’m just sorry it’s taken me this long to realise.

breaking up with my phone

I’m breaking up with my phone!

Dear Bear and Beany

26 Comments

  1. October 5, 2016 / 7:22 pm

    Very powerful and thought provoking post. I am always conscious of this, I try where possible to only go on my phone while Miss H is sleeping, at nursery or having a little bit of independent play time x

  2. October 7, 2016 / 7:51 am

    Hope it helps, but to be honest I don’t think I could do it. Mainly because I don’t want to enough. But you sound like you’ve made a big life decision here and thats brilliant. I hope it works out for you. #picknmix

  3. October 7, 2016 / 8:41 am

    Yes to all of this. I think its the same for a lot of people and we could all take a lesson from this. I know I am making a conscious effort to stop saying ‘in a minute’. x
    Laura – dear bear and beany recently posted…A Snapshot of September…My Profile

  4. October 7, 2016 / 11:19 am

    Yes to everything you’ve said, and I really do need to reevaluate my relationship with my phone! I used mine far less than usual on holiday and it was a nice break, and I didn’t miss it as much as I thought I would xx

  5. October 7, 2016 / 1:17 pm

    Yes! I feel exactly the same and I need to break up with my phone too! They can be so distracting and such time wasters. I hope the break up goes smoothly xx #picknmix
    wendy recently posted…Everything you need to know about babywearingMy Profile

  6. October 7, 2016 / 2:25 pm

    This really hit a note with me. I think me and my phone need to sit down and have a chat tonight. #picknmix

  7. October 7, 2016 / 7:02 pm

    I am quite addicted to my phone, so leave it at home if I go out. I remember being at concerts and seeing people spent the whole event viewing it from behind their phone screens, such a waste. #picknmix
    Tracey Abrahams recently posted…Why I Shared THAT StoryMy Profile

  8. October 9, 2016 / 5:47 pm

    Oh I need to break up with my phone too – all the things you said describe my life…totally addicted with my phone and often feel like I’m using it in secret! Thanks for hosting #picknmix
    Bridie By The Sea recently posted…Triple Chocolate Cookies with ButterkistMy Profile

  9. October 9, 2016 / 10:23 pm

    I have been feeling like this a lot recently. I have also decided that now I am back at university I am only going to use my phone if it rings. I feel like it’s stuck to me and I hate it! It really is like an addiction that I need to cut down on, I’m going to try to not use my phone until the boys have gone to sleep and only use it throughout the day if:

    1. it rings
    2. I need to phone someone
    3. I get a text (not a notification but an actual text!)
    4. To take a picture

    I feel like I will be a lot better off if I just put my phone down and forget about it but I do use my phone a lot to take photos of the boys.

    Good luck! #sharingthebloglove
    Jade – Raw Childhood recently posted…Too pretty to be boysMy Profile

  10. October 10, 2016 / 5:15 pm

    I know exactly how you feel and I’m planning a post around ‘screen time’ too. When I watch old films or TV shows I realise that everyone just enjoyed their days, they weren’t constantly checking their phones. The funny thing is, it’s very rare that something exciting happens anyway, but we’re still compelled to check them! Good luck with your relationship break-up x #PicknMix

  11. October 11, 2016 / 5:10 pm

    I remember my Dad saying the same thing about using the video camera when we were kids, that he felt he missed the moment because he was behind the camera. I’ve definitely been guilty of spending too much time on my phone, and I’ve tried to put a stop to that lately by leaving it in my handbag for a few hours if we’re at home, and not constantly checking it if we’re out and about. But the fact that considering leaving it at home for the day while we go out makes me feel quite anxious probably says a lot. Thanks so much for joining us at #SharingtheBlogLove with such a thought provoking post.

  12. October 13, 2016 / 2:25 pm

    Total phone addict checking in . I’m not sure I’m ready to break up but I think we may need to step back and take it slower. Blogging does not help with the addiction! #SharingTheBlogLove

  13. October 13, 2016 / 6:44 pm

    I am so guilty of this too and know I should stop but I find it so hard to! Maybe I need to withdraw from it in increments so I don’t go completely cold turkey! #PicknMix
    Maria recently posted…Top Tips For Selling On eBayMy Profile

  14. October 14, 2016 / 1:50 am

    Phones are very addictive but then they’re also very convenient! I think it’s good to take a break and switch of from time to time as there’s just so much drama online which to be honest gets more stressful than my actual life! #sharingthebloglove

  15. October 14, 2016 / 2:16 am

    I feel the exact same way about my phone. Unfortunately my addiction has caused my husband to start using his more so now he’s the one ignoring me. We’re organising at home date nights that are TV and phone free to help break the bad habit and increase communication. #sharingthebloglove

  16. October 15, 2016 / 11:47 am

    That’s really good post I think most of us can relate to it. Although it’s quite hard to not checking phone if we are in blogosphere 😉
    #SharingtheBlogLove

  17. October 16, 2016 / 9:09 am

    We’re all guilty of this. It’s the modern age. I think it’s everything in moderation. It doesn’t hurt to put it down or put it away for a little while – it will make your time together all the more special (and with your phone when they’re in bed!) 🙂 #sharingthebloglove
    Jaki recently posted…Our Torquay Mini Break & The Crowndale HotelMy Profile

  18. October 16, 2016 / 2:45 pm

    I completely relate to what you said in your post but breaking up with our phone is tough for us bloggers… I wish I could find the right balance!

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